I started when I was 17-years-old. My friend took me to the pub and it was the first time I was exposed to it.
The race commentator was calling names out enthusiastically, I could hear the horses running into the grass and I felt the urge to place a bet, so I started with five dollars.
After that day we returned every week and at some point I started going alone, only stopping when I was caught for being underage.
When I turned 18 - thinking I was a responsible adult - I went straight back, simply out of boredom. When I discovered that’s when it really developed. It was so accessible, I had privacy and, payment from wins were instant. I was putting aside 50 dollars each day but spending more than five hours gambling.
Online gambling sent Bayu Pratama into a downward spiral. Photo: Supplied Source: Supplied
Every gambler will tell you the same thing: the addiction comes from the euphoric feeling after a win. Your serotonin increases and you think you’re on top of the world. You think you are capable of making money out of gambling, no matter how small the win.
Even when you remember how much money you’ve lost, you only care about winning it back. If I went to bed, the next day in my mind I would be picking up from the day before. I would always remain optimistic about my chances.
For three years from the age of 19 to 21 I gambled almost every single day. I would stay up until 3am, betting on 30 to 40 races each night. At this point I was working to spend $300 to $500 dollars a week on my gambling.
I convinced myself I was gambling to get the stress off my mind - stress that wasn’t there. I didn’t want to make gambling the problem.
When my friends found out, they pushed me further into isolation. They made me feel ashamed of what I did, but my mistake was telling them I had it under control.
Trying to talk to my parents about it was even harder. Many parents from culturally and linguistically diverse backgrounds come to Australia to open opportunities up to their kids. So when we instead turn to partying, drugs or gambling, it takes a long time to talk about it or get help. As their kid you don’t want to bring shame to them or disappoint them when they’ve worked so hard to get here.
One night while gambling, I got ahead of myself and lost a lot. A five-digit figure. I was
devastated, but something clicked in my mind. I confided in a friend and we agreed it was time to get help.
We sat down and started calling a bunch of organisations and the first support service I could get a hold of offered a psychologist. I hated it. The focus was on my family history and not how to stop the daily cycle.
I took it into my own hands and deleted all related apps, social media and metadata which knew of my gambling history. On Facebook a simple hashtag of sports is enough to be targeted with sports betting advertisements.
On the search for a support program my friend sent through a volunteering link, but it was completely unrelated to gambling.
I went along anyway and found the program helped newly arrived migrants settle in Australia. It helped them overcome language barriers, financial difficulties, create resumes and more.
After meeting a lot of young people from troubled backgrounds I was motivated to change my ways. The satisfaction from giving them hope exceeded any happiness I thought I got from gambling.
I am now 22 and I keep myself distracted by volunteering at six organisations, in one as an anti-gambling advocate. I was so affected by my experiences that I turned to a holistic career goal and have since started studying youth work.
If you or someone you know needs help with a gambling addiction you can try these services: , , , .
